Layers of Inspiration

BlaqKofi

SHEDDING LAYERS
A good friend and fellow Sisterlocker, MsP, left for her own personal Eat, Pray, Love journey.  How liberating to shed layers that no longer serve us and unveil new ones that do. I am so happy for and proud of her.  She inspires me...

A week before leaving she called to say she was thinking of cutting her shoulder length locks. "Will I be breaking some Sisterlocks sacred rule?," she asked half jokingly.  I said, "you're locked - not locked up." I encouraged her to fully honor where her spirit was leading.

I reminded her that Sisterlocks has dispelled the "we can't grow our hair long" myth.  And because we can, we have all the freedom to style our locks in any way - including cutting them.  Afterall, they will grow back - it's hair.

So she began her new journey with a cute and versatile short cut courtesy of our fabulous friend and Consultant, Gigi who gave her a funky, vibrant outward expression of her inner newness.  What freedom to be and do what is in alignment with truth!

"Change is the essence of life.  Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become."  ~Unknown

LAYERS OF SISTERHOOD
Six months ago my eyes surveyed a room of friends and loved ones and sitting right up front was Gigi and her husband Eddy - right where I could see their faces and feel their love and energy as I stood to honor my lil sis, T at her Life Celebration.  Their presence strengthened me.

Gigi

Six months to the day, October 26,  I sat in the closest seat in eyesight of my dear friend as she celebrated the life of her beloved Eddy, also taken by the unforgiving disease of cancer.  I willed her strength on that day, just as I know she and Eddy had done for me a mere six months earlier. Gigi arranged a joyful Life Celebration that was so much like Eddy. I know that he was proud of his Queen.

She inspires me...

She first became my consultant, then my friend, my confidante, and my mentor, teaching me so much.  I honestly don't know where I'd be without her gentle and conscious guidance. She is greatly responsible for the awakening of my truth and I'll love her forever for that gift.

Our sisterhood was ordained by the birth of her granddaughter, Hapi on my lockversary.  We are further bound by our similar life experiences, even losing those most dear to our hearts exactly six months apart. And the layers of our sisterhood grows as we help each other face each day without them.  Six and half years ago, I sat in Gigi's chair - I thought - simply to get Sisterlocks.  Little did I know it would evolve into a lifestyle of self discovery - rather than a hairstyle.  
(Photos: Gigi visiting me in OKC last month.)

Gigi

LOCK LAYERS
Cutting my locks has always been emotional and difficult for me. I don't let anyone other than Gigi maintain my locks and I've never let her cut more than just bangs and dead ends.  And even that was traumatic.  I found it difficult to part with that which had become such a part of me.

Three days after Eddy's Life Celebration, I sat in Gigi's chair buoyed by MsP's bold life steps, and reminded of life's fleeting moments by T and Eddy - and for the first time said, "I'd like you to cut my locks.  You have free reign. I won't question you - just maintain my length.

LAYERS OF INSPIRATION
I sat in Gigi's chair, inhaling deeply with each "snip" of the scissors and each "thud" of locks falling to the floor.  It was as if part of me was being cut away.  Anything living needs some pruning in order to continue healthy growth.  Otherwise, the old, lifeless parts weigh down, slow down and sometimes even cuts down the possibility of newness.  So often we hold onto that which should be released.  Perhaps it's time for me to shed some old layers of hurt and grief and begin to live and love again.

Gigi placed a gentle hand on my shoulder, leaned over and said knowingly, it's ok - you can breath. I wasn't even aware of my held breath.  I let out a long exhale and we both cracked up with laughter.  I relaxed my shoulders and sat back in her chair - allowing myself to be vunerable - knowing that I'd be ok, regardless.  I emerged with the perfect layered cut.  It felt light, vibrant and free - so did I.

Thank you for the layers of inspiration MsP, Gigi, T and Eddy...as my Sisterlocks and I begin our next journey.

Before/Fresh out of Gigi's chair

Thicker prior to cut/Lighter after cut

Curled Before Cut/After Cut

Day of cut

BlaqKofi

"The true essence of naturalness is freedom  - 

whether locked, twisted, dreaded, cornrowed or Afro'd." ~BlaqKofi


I was inspired today by an email from Debra W, of Rome, Ga.
Thank you for the sisterly love.  


And a heartfelt thank you to my first client, Monica, who called to say,
"When are we gonna get Part II of Layers?"
Thanks, Sis for the motivation to begin to writing once more. 


Click photos for greater detail.

A Blaq Moment...

Love isn't perfection
rather the ability to love
in spite of imperfections
is truth,
is life,
is Sisterlocks...

BlaqKofi

(Click photo for greater detail)

It's Official

I did it, my Sisters - BlaqKofi, Certified Sisterlocks Consultant. The first certified consultant in the State of Oklahoma! I discovered this wonderful news Thurs, July 30, a bright spot in an otherwise very stressful day. (Thanks for your thoughtful phone call, LaShaune.)
A special thank you to my first three clients, "M" "S" and "Abuelita" for being the first to put your trust in me. I'm certified because of each of you. Locked4Life!

My certification, a blog comment from Happiest Nappy (I ab-so-lute-ly LOVE that name!) compelled me to share the following in celebration of my Sisters. The author is unknown.
A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot, humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter 'Don't forget your Sisters,' she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass.

‘They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them.

'Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women... your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do...'

‘What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman thought. Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!'

But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact with her Sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, Sisters are the mainstays of her life.

After more than 50 years of living in this world, here is what I've learned:

THIS SAYS IT ALL:
Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors...
Careers end.

BUT.........Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on,praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.

Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you...Or come in and carry you out. Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family all bless our life!

The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other.

Everyday, we need each other still.

Pass this on to all the women who help make your life meaningful.I just did.

Dedicated to those who encourage me to continue Natural Awakening. I am inspired by those who write to share how NA influenced their decision to lock and it's usefulness as a resource throughtout their journey.
Time to write has been scarces - yet life continues unfolding providing more Natural Awakenings...until next time,

Thank you, my Sisters.
BlaqKofi
Certified Sisterlocks Consultant

Special shout out to Happiest Nappy. Tell hubby he gets mad props for being educated about naturalness AND supportive.

Feeling Kinda Cute at Almost 6 Months!

I don't have my digital camera so decided to use my Web cam today because my hair was so full and pretty and I was feeling kinda cute. Got a new pair of low rise jeans and finally figured out how to comfortably wear them ( I am getting old). So I was struttin' my locks and my jeans!

The photos don't really capture the fullness, but here I am anyway. I'm two weeks from my six month anniversary and still luvin my locks. I only wear my hair in the braid out style now and spritz with water every day.

My hair is really growing (although you can't tell from the pics) and remains very healthy and soft. The braids are thicker (although still small) and very full. Several have completely locked and my hair continues to be the playground for my hands. I love the feel and texture and it's so exciting to discover another completely locked strand. My color is beginning to wear off (I colored my hair a week before locking). I'm afraid to recolor, despite the gray hairs showing, because I've read some experiences on LockItUp that coloring can cause dryness. So I'll wait until my one year anniversary, perhaps (wink!)

The stringy appearance on the top are ends that are not locked yet. On work day mornings after I take my braids down, I roll the top where the ends are a little stringy and jump in the shower. By the time I get out, there's a soft curl to the top that gets rid of the stringy look. I hand comb the rest and off I go. The back is locking much faster than the front and looks really full and pretty as you can tell from the above pic.

I'll be posting pics from our next DFW Sisterlock Gathering scheduled for December 4 at my house, and pics from the retightening class that LaChanda, Karen and I are taking from GiGi on December 9 which will be my six month anniversary to the day! (We started on June 9 and finished on June 10.) I love my Sisterlocks!

"Do not undermine your worth
by comparing yourself with others.

It is because we are different
that each of us is uniquely special."

Author Unknown

Retightening, Braiding & Banding at 5 months

I got my hair retigtened on Friday. As usual it was great to see my consultant, GiGi. The difference after a retightening is more visible scalp and less fullness. But my head feels wonderful. Notice the precise parting - an important distinction of Sisterlocks. The parting patterns allows for more styling flexibility.

I decided to wash my hair after the retightening just to gain some more volume. These pictures show banding and braiding before washing. This along with a gentle washing technique is required until the locks have matured enough not to unravel. You should not scrub or aggressively manipulate the hair during washing. Instead the shampoo is massaged or pressed through the braids and rinsed thoroughly. I bet you never thought of washing your hair after coming from the salon (o.k. I'm from Texas) after coming from da beauty shop...lol. Just another benefit of Sisterlocks!

I'm still banding and braiding. In fact, I didn't even ask Gigi if I could stop during this visit. There are still several ends that haven't sealed yet. You can tell by the remaining curly q's on some of them. Probably at my six month mark in December I won't have to band and braid anymore. But I'll definitely wait for my consultant's o.k. My locking journey has gone so smoothly, I don't want to do anything to hinder my progress.

I asked Gigi how soon she thought I'd be fully locked. She estimated at the nine month juncture. That's only three months from now! But it doesn't matter, the time is going by so fast. And I'm so thoroughly enjoying learning how to care for my natural hair and the freedom of Sisterlocks; I'd be happy no matter when my hair fully locks. (Click on any photo to enlarge for greater detail.)

So many black women have straightened, relaxed and permed their hair for years, they have never had the opportunity to experience its true natural beauty. The average 30-year-old woman has been straightening her hair since childhood to adoloscence; perhaps at least 20 years. And even though she may comb and groom her straight hair daily, she is not likely to experiment and explore what her natural hair texture can or cannot do.

"Let's Talk Hair - Every Black Woman's Personal Consultation for Healthy Growing Hair" - Pamela Ferrell

21 Weeks of Sisterlocks & Other Things

Wow, my hair is really growing. I took some new pics and while browsing through my files, decided to compare an early pic to a current one. I was amazed at the growth and how fast time has gone. I remember waiting anxiously for my first consult and test locks then anticipating - counting down to lock day. Check out my hair four months later, pretty cool.

The love affair with my locks remains strong and intact. They are beginning to thicken, the back is locking faster than the top and sides. I'm still banding and braiding before washing. Some are beginning to "drop", very few; but those that do are noticeable. My hair remains soft and nice to touch. No maintenance other than washing with the SL Starter Shampoo along with a light distilled rose water spritz when I feel the need. I read a LockItUp post that said, "Sisterlocks are low maintenance, not no maintenance." So true, there is very little required other than caring for them. As long as you do that, your hair challenges will be non-existent.

I haven't posted in a while. Life's been tough and I haven't felt the urge to write. I haven't even had much time for my LockItUp group. Work has also been kickin' my butt. I helped introduce two major company-wide initiatives. Long hours and lots of stress. But a sistuh represented well.

Things are becoming less stressful and looking brighter personally. So here I am once again. Of course, you didn't really think I'd go away, now did you? That which doesn't kill you will only make you stronger.

I was recently inspired by one of my fellow Yahoo LockItUp group members, Erin who just published her own blog. I love what the sister is doing in her faith walk. I'm looking forward to her promise of open and frank post on whatever inspires her, in addition to sharing her Sisterlocks journey. I admire that. I've added a link to her blog in the left column, stop by and check her out.

So look for more of my thoughts or whatever I feel like sharing about any matter in future post. I've often wanted to post on issues outside of my hair journey, but was hesitant to be "out there." The original premise was to solely track my Sisterlock journey. But I'm evolving as a person along with my locks. When I started this blog I noted that it was a pivotal time in my life - and it is my site afterall, I can write about whatever. Duh!!! (laughing at myself). Those who wish to read it can, and those who don't can pass...Erin's blog along with a deep conversation with Jen from Waco during the recent Sisterlocks DFW Brunch gave me the inspiration and courage to just let go. Meanwhile, back in Sisterlocksville....

My hair's almost long enough to put up. Can't wait. But overall I feel good. My locks are healthy and I have very little slippage. I'll be 46 years old this December and my skin is looking really nice and smooth these days. I'm confidently wearing less makeup. I don't know what to attribute it to - vitamins, biotin, wheatgrass smoothies, drinking more water? I do all of these. Guess it doesn't really matter, I should just keep doing it.

Someone said to me, "Sisterlocks sounds more expensive than permed hair with all of the stuff you take." My reply, "I take those things because I want to, not because I have to. Not only is my hair growing, but so is my knowledge, knowledge of self and what's good for my body. When you know better, you do better. Sisterlocks isn't just a hairstyle, it's a lifestyle." And that concluded that conversation...

"If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in
the race of life. With confidence you have won even before you have started."

The Philosophy & Opinions of Marcus Garvey