A Destined Love Affair, Sisterlocks

the love affair,
destined from the beginning -
subconsciously,
i journeyed into this knowledge

loved others? i thought, but
an unrest would not let me be
searching…searching…
searching for what?
the BlaqKofi within me

the love affair,
guided by a natural force
the journey, trials, errors
and never ending unrest
bringing us closer, closer
until I was ready to be
ready…ready…
ready for who?
the BlaqKofi within me

the union, inevitable
moving, unknowingly towards each other
learning, growing, bonding, maturing
a first in my life
certain of me

proud BlaqKofi
for the world to see

part of it lost, and
i wanted to cry -
yet, the love affair cont’d
growing stronger

this time, even longer
proof you see

BlaqKofi, uniquely me

the love affair was destined…
once I found it - or it found me
No more unrest, I knew it to be
a union so right, so comfortable, and free
my naturalness and Sisterlocks –
the keys that unlocked
the BlaqKofi within me

(The above is a work in progress, subject to revisions, but thought I'd share anyway.)

Getting Sisterlocked signified a major turning point in my life. As they matured and evolved - so did I. They are such a part of my evolution as a complete person that I felt an unexpected twinge of anxiety when Gigi recently “trimmed my ends” more than I anticipated. I was hesitant and didn’t want to let them go. But just like overcoming life's challenges, the trim made my locks healthier, more manageable and versatile. The length has already surpassed where it was before the trim. Sometimes we just need to rid ourselves of “dead ends” or "dead weight" and start fresh – becoming renewed to allow expanded growth.

As I continue to celebrate my Sisterlocks three year anniversary, I have lots to share. I’m experiencing all of the fullness and richness of life right now. And while the “alone” time to write and share isn’t as abundant as it once was, I’m thankful for the reason.

So be patient with me and know that I appreciate all who visit and email. While I may not be able to reply to each of you individually, your feedback and questions continue to motivate, encourage and fuel my mind with enriched substance to share in Natural Awakenings.

Peace & blessings always,

BlaqKofi

Hairstyles: Top flex rod set pony using B-tie; middle-flex rod set; bottom two shots-braidout front/back after trim

On Aging - I Can Still Breathe In

Yesterday, I woke to the smiling face of my beautiful granddaughter. It was our weekly sleepover and my 48th birthday. I'm so thankful for my many blessings and the fact that I can still breathe in..

When you see me sitting quietly,

Like a sack left on the shelf,

Don't think I need your chattering.

I'm listening to myself.

Hold! Stop! Don't pity me!

Hold! Stop your sympathy!

Understanding if you got it,

Otherwise I'll do without it!
When my bones are stiff and aching

And my feet won't climb the stair,

I will only ask one favor:

Don't bring me no rocking chair.When you see me walking, stumbling,

Don't study and get it wrong.

'Cause tired don't mean lazy

And every goodbye ain't gone.

I'm the same person I was back then,

A little less hair, a little less chin,

A lot less lungs and much less wind.

But ain't I lucky I can still breathe in.

On Aging
Maya Angelou

Hairstyle: Flex rod curl set, pulled high with B-Tie.

That Small Voice

My daughter-in-law recently sent me Maya Angelous' "Best Poem Ever." Although I've read it countless times before - it resonated with me at this appointed time in my life. As I continue to work on achieving many of the truths herein, I thought it might inspire other beautiful, locked, nubian sisters on this journey of self realization.

There are times in our lives when we each need that small voice that helps us to focus within, so I gift to you -

"The Best Poem Ever" by Maya Angelou
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....Something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...A youth she's content to leave behind....
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....One friend who always makes her laugh...And one who lets her cry...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....A feeling of control over her destiny...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...How to fall in love without losing herself...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...How to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...When to try harder...And when to walk away...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...That her childhood may not have been perfect...But it's over...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...What she would and wouldn't do for love or more...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...How to live alone...Even if she doesn't like it...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...Whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...Where to go...be it to her best friend's kitchen table...or a charming inn in the woods...When her soul needs soothing...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...What she can and can't accomplish in a day...a month...and a year...

Hairstyle braid out: Braid locks in small plaits, spritz with Lottabody. Roll ends. Take down when dry, finger style.

14 Weeks & Curls!

Curls and more curls. My hair is changing and I continue to love it. The nape of my hair (the kitchen) is beginning to lock first. The curly que ends are turning up into the lock and they are beginning to get a cylinder feel to them. Not much difference in the rest of my head, but I know I'm progressing. My hands continue to absently migrate to my head as if they have a mind of their own. I love the feel of being able to touch my hair all the way to the scalp without worrying about a thing - and no residue from all the gook I used to use. Distilled water and a few drops of Rose Water concentrate remain my only hair regimen.

I've made a serious attempt to stay away from the curlers. But I continue to do the braid out. Since my 3rd retightening on September 2, I haven't worn any hair ornaments, head bands or scarves. Haven't had to, perhaps because it's gaining length.

This look was achieved by braiding my hair in 10-12 large braids and spritzing well with distilled rose water. But this time I rolled the ends with the bendable rollers. The result - this curly, krinkly look. I received so many compliments at work. I've worn it like this for three days now, without doing anything else to it. I don't even tie it up at night. I just wake up, shower, finger comb and style and off I go. I do indeed LOVE MY SISTERLOCKS. Thank you Dr. Cornwell!

If you had a choice of skin

Which would you choose to be in?

If you could select a texture of your hair

Which would you choose to wear?

If you could give a new name

Would you choose one that would defame?

If you had a choice

Would you choose wisely?

From the Browder File

(Revised & Expanded Edition)

Anthony T. Browder